Is your life so busy that your spouse seems more like your roommate than your lover? If you feel like between your responsibilities with work, parenting, kids activities and volunteering you barely have time for anything other than a “goodnight kiss.” It’s important to remember that communication, affection and time together are key to maintaining a happy relationship. Take a few moments today to try these ideas to reignite the spark that once burned bright.
As you know, relationships are like any other important living thing—they need to
be nurtured and cared for in order grow and thrive. Here are four ideas for you to consider as you travel on the path of reconnection.
1. Create rules of connection
When life gets busy, making plans to connect on a regular basis is key to reigniting and maintaining your intimate relationship. One couple I know cuddles every morning and every night they are together. This has become part of their routine, and even though sometimes they are both tired or rushed they set the alarm five minutes early or go to bed five minutes later to make sure that this happens.
2. Build in spontaneity and adventure
While scheduled “together time” is important, you can also mix it up and keep things exciting with activities that are fun and spontaneous. Surprise your partner with a gourmet breakfast in bed. Crank up some great music and have an impromptu dance party in the middle of the kitchen.
3. Make flirtation and intimacy a priority
Send each other a text that say’s “I love you” or look through old photos of when you first met and then plan a date to relive some of your first outings together. When it comes to sex and intimacy, find time for moments when you allow yourselves to get close physically—even if it is simply giving each other shoulder massages before bed.
4. Be interesting and interested
One great way to connect with your partner is to be genuinely interested in what that person is thinking, feeling and doing. When your mate is in the mood to talk, ask questions, discuss favorite activities or what funny thing happened at work that day.
For those moments when you’re both “brain dead,” create a jar of quirky questions to take turns answering when you need a break. Think outside the box— try these on for size!
• “If you owned an island, what type of businesses would you allow on your island?”
• “If you had the opportunity to make a movie of one of your favorite stories, which one would it be?”
• “If you could learn to do something in a day, what would it be?”
Stop making excuses! Make time to engage, touch, talk, listen and, most of all, connect with the person who stole your heart all those years ago.
